Well, I'm back from France. Had a lovely time in the roasting heat - 33 degrees! Swam loads, ate loads... I followed ADF mostly, although at the end of the week I had a two feast days followed by a half feast day - fast until dinner which was a burger and chips and chocolate cake!
Still though, I gained nothing.
Got back on Tuesday, and I've been pretty careful since then - my feast days have been reaching 1800 maximum. However, I still haven't lost anything and it's been 10 days now so I might step it up a bit and have a feast day of 2200 calories or so on Sunday. Or I could start going for walks but...
The squats died a death when I got to France and I haven't bothered starting again. I might... but then I might not. I think I need to look at more before and after pictures to get motivated!
Going back to work in a month - I work in a school so have the summer off. So I'd like to have lost a bit more by then - I've lost 15 kilos so far - if I could have lost another 4 kilos by then, that would be 3 stone, or 41 pounds. Considering I started at the end of May, just when the school holidays began, I would hope to get lots of nice, confidence-boosting comments from people who haven't seen me in 3 months. "Oh my goodness, you're so slim!" would be a nice one to hear... Although unrealistic!
I must say, my confidence really has soared. Even though I'm still very overweight and my BMI is ridiculous, just knowing that I've lost a good bit and that I'm still on the right path is very uplifting. My skinny French cousins were there some of the days when I went to swim and whilst I did wrap a towel around me until the last possible moment, I did actually swim. Before I'd have pretended that I didn't want to and I'd have sat on a deckchair in my clothes, dying of the heat.
I also, for the first time in years, wore tops with no sleeves and didn't put on a cardigan over! I really couldn't have, considering the heat, but it was the first time I wasn't crippled with self-consciousness. I also wore shorts - even with my tree-stump legs. The thing is, I have been thinner than I am now in the past and even then was too self-conscious to wear these things or to swim in front of people - so my confidence is nothing to do with my weight and everything to do with my mental state - feeling capable and guilt-free.
My intolerance to bread has become very extreme on this diet though. As I said before, I am allergic to yeast but in small moderations it didn't cause me any problems. However, on Monday I had a burger, and my arm was all sore and itchy for two days after. It's gone again now and today I bought gluten-free bread. It does have yeast in it but I'm going to see if I manage to get away with that. I shouldn't be able to, because pasta causes nothing, so it does seem to be yeast and not gluten that's the problem but I'm quite desperate to find something I can have if I feel like toast or a sandwich. I don't know of anything that is yeast-free bar wraps but they're not really what I'm looking for. I thought that pitta breads were yeast-free as they're flat but apparently not...
Right - at the end of another feast day and I have that slight sense of disappointment I always have when the last meal of the day is done - with the thought of a fast day ahead of me tomorrow. I bought huge mushrooms which I'm going to stuff with garlic and cream cheese tomorrow night for dinner so at least I have something tasty to look forward to!
Showing posts with label Insecurity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Insecurity. Show all posts
Friday, 26 July 2013
Sunday, 16 June 2013
Time to Eat
Ugh, what a horrible couple of days.
An American branch of the Georgian Society is coming to see our house tonight. It's an old family house, built in the 1700s so it's of interest to them. However, there are ten of them coming, and we're supposed to give them dinner. My mum was in charge of all that but now she's gone to France to be with my grandmother so I'm doing it.
So I spent all yesterday cleaning the kitchen and bathrooms, peeling 40 potatoes, chopping about 20 red peppers and doing the shopping. In addition to that, my dad realised that his passport is out of date, and he's booked to fly to Paris for the funeral on Wednesday. So there was huge panic and worry there, because my mum would be so upset if he didn't come. I think we got it sorted, but being the weekend, we won't know for sure until Monday morning. I really hope it works out - he HAS to come.
As a result of all that, even though it was supposed to be a feast day, I didn't eat, apart from two Weetabix with fat-free milk for breakfast, and John made me a salad with 3 slices of ham, 50 grms of smoked salmon, one hard-boiled egg, a green pepper, lettuce, a tomato and about 20 grms of low-fat mayonnaise. So my total calorie consumption for the day was 592. Essentially another fast day.
So, I'm taking today as a feast day instead. I will also be at the dinner for the Americans so I'm going to eat to my heart's content. In an effort to keep control of myself, I'm going to fast until dinner - instead of treating today as a pigging out day. But I will help myself to whatever I like tonight.
To start with, we're having nibbles - my sister and I will make guacamole, hummus and smoked mackerel pate. We also have some crisps, focaccia bread that we'll tear into strips, carrot and cucumber sticks, and... I think that's it. Needless to say, I love every single one of those things, and there is nothing I love more than nibbles. So, for the first time in two and a half weeks, I'm not going to even count calories and I'll have a thoroughly enjoyable feast day.
Dinner will be mashed potatoes, with ratatouille and baked salmon, served with a mustard and cream sauce. Not too bad really. Dessert will be courtesy of my sister - a chocolate tart and a baked lemon cheesecake. Neither of which are at the top of my dessert preference so considering I'll probably be full anyway, I won't have any of them.
Right - it's half ten and they're coming at half six tonight. I'd better get ready and drive down. Busy day ahead!
An American branch of the Georgian Society is coming to see our house tonight. It's an old family house, built in the 1700s so it's of interest to them. However, there are ten of them coming, and we're supposed to give them dinner. My mum was in charge of all that but now she's gone to France to be with my grandmother so I'm doing it.
So I spent all yesterday cleaning the kitchen and bathrooms, peeling 40 potatoes, chopping about 20 red peppers and doing the shopping. In addition to that, my dad realised that his passport is out of date, and he's booked to fly to Paris for the funeral on Wednesday. So there was huge panic and worry there, because my mum would be so upset if he didn't come. I think we got it sorted, but being the weekend, we won't know for sure until Monday morning. I really hope it works out - he HAS to come.
As a result of all that, even though it was supposed to be a feast day, I didn't eat, apart from two Weetabix with fat-free milk for breakfast, and John made me a salad with 3 slices of ham, 50 grms of smoked salmon, one hard-boiled egg, a green pepper, lettuce, a tomato and about 20 grms of low-fat mayonnaise. So my total calorie consumption for the day was 592. Essentially another fast day.
So, I'm taking today as a feast day instead. I will also be at the dinner for the Americans so I'm going to eat to my heart's content. In an effort to keep control of myself, I'm going to fast until dinner - instead of treating today as a pigging out day. But I will help myself to whatever I like tonight.
To start with, we're having nibbles - my sister and I will make guacamole, hummus and smoked mackerel pate. We also have some crisps, focaccia bread that we'll tear into strips, carrot and cucumber sticks, and... I think that's it. Needless to say, I love every single one of those things, and there is nothing I love more than nibbles. So, for the first time in two and a half weeks, I'm not going to even count calories and I'll have a thoroughly enjoyable feast day.
Dinner will be mashed potatoes, with ratatouille and baked salmon, served with a mustard and cream sauce. Not too bad really. Dessert will be courtesy of my sister - a chocolate tart and a baked lemon cheesecake. Neither of which are at the top of my dessert preference so considering I'll probably be full anyway, I won't have any of them.
Right - it's half ten and they're coming at half six tonight. I'd better get ready and drive down. Busy day ahead!
Friday, 14 June 2013
Upheaval
So yesterday was a feast day again. To try to up my calories a bit on feast days, and to feel like I was treating myself, I had some breakfast - two Weetabix and 200mls of fat-free milk. 216 calories only!
Since breakfast was so low, and since John was at work, I decided to go all out and have one of my favourite meals. Pasta, pesto and cheese. As a nod to eating healthily, I had 150 grms of wholegrain noodles instead of pasta - similar taste and lower in calories. I had 24 grms of pesto and TWO servings of low-fat cheddar - 60 grms. It came to - 629 calories only!
So for dinner I made my fish-pie - smoked Coley, prawns, white sauce made with cornflour, butter and vegetable stock, TONS of vegetables, and mashed potato made with fat-free milk and butter. I weighed everything, thinking that it would be nice to know the calories, even though I figured it would be high and I didn't care - it came to 347 calories. It's unbelievable. 1192 calories for the whole day. Way under what I should be at on a normal day - dieting aside. It just shows - some careful substitutions and portion control is a huge part of losing weight.
However, I am still going to carry on with the ADF as I actually enjoy fasting and I want the option to pig out to be there.
I woke up this morning to hear that my grandfather had died in the night. He was 88 and lovely. I got on really well with him - he had a great sense of humour. So that was upsetting.
Since my grandparents are French, we spent the day running around booking flights to Paris and getting things sorted. Which was good - kept me busy and mind off my stomach amongst other things. I just had a bowl of soup with some soda bread for lunch. With milk in coffee, my day came to 505 calories.
The next week will be a bit iffy I'd say. I'm flying out on Monday and returning on Friday. I would imagine that there'll be a lot of sitting around and eating with various relations. On Monday, I fly out with my sister but on Friday I'm returning to Ireland alone. Travelling alone is one of my worst times for pigging out. However, it will be a feast day so maybe I'll let loose. I'll see. (To the consternation of John who just read that over my shoulder… :) )
Anyway, to make things a little better, I had lost another kilo this morning. At last. I was a bit discouraged yesterday, because I hadn't lost any weight in a good few days. However, thinking about it, I only started dieting at all two weeks ago yesterday. So I've lost nine kilos in 15 days.
Pretty happy overall!
I must say though, I'm dreading going to France. Apart from the obvious upset of the situation at hand, all my cousins will be there - and they're all so tanned and slim and petite. And then there's me - towering over everyone, pasty white, and waddly. Life is so unfair!
Since breakfast was so low, and since John was at work, I decided to go all out and have one of my favourite meals. Pasta, pesto and cheese. As a nod to eating healthily, I had 150 grms of wholegrain noodles instead of pasta - similar taste and lower in calories. I had 24 grms of pesto and TWO servings of low-fat cheddar - 60 grms. It came to - 629 calories only!
So for dinner I made my fish-pie - smoked Coley, prawns, white sauce made with cornflour, butter and vegetable stock, TONS of vegetables, and mashed potato made with fat-free milk and butter. I weighed everything, thinking that it would be nice to know the calories, even though I figured it would be high and I didn't care - it came to 347 calories. It's unbelievable. 1192 calories for the whole day. Way under what I should be at on a normal day - dieting aside. It just shows - some careful substitutions and portion control is a huge part of losing weight.
However, I am still going to carry on with the ADF as I actually enjoy fasting and I want the option to pig out to be there.
I woke up this morning to hear that my grandfather had died in the night. He was 88 and lovely. I got on really well with him - he had a great sense of humour. So that was upsetting.
Since my grandparents are French, we spent the day running around booking flights to Paris and getting things sorted. Which was good - kept me busy and mind off my stomach amongst other things. I just had a bowl of soup with some soda bread for lunch. With milk in coffee, my day came to 505 calories.
The next week will be a bit iffy I'd say. I'm flying out on Monday and returning on Friday. I would imagine that there'll be a lot of sitting around and eating with various relations. On Monday, I fly out with my sister but on Friday I'm returning to Ireland alone. Travelling alone is one of my worst times for pigging out. However, it will be a feast day so maybe I'll let loose. I'll see. (To the consternation of John who just read that over my shoulder… :) )
Anyway, to make things a little better, I had lost another kilo this morning. At last. I was a bit discouraged yesterday, because I hadn't lost any weight in a good few days. However, thinking about it, I only started dieting at all two weeks ago yesterday. So I've lost nine kilos in 15 days.
Pretty happy overall!
I must say though, I'm dreading going to France. Apart from the obvious upset of the situation at hand, all my cousins will be there - and they're all so tanned and slim and petite. And then there's me - towering over everyone, pasty white, and waddly. Life is so unfair!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)